Conversations
This week has been I one that I can't help but write about.
There aren't many times in life that we get to have conversations with people that change something in us. It is more than changing our minds, perspectives, or views. I feel like these conversations touched a part of my soul that I had either forgotten about or just plain didn't know existed.
The first one was with a sweet woman who found it in her heart to trust me enough to share parts of her life that would have stopped the ordinary person from ever getting out of bed ever again! I don't feel like I can share the specifics of her story because I don't have her permission to do so, but I can tell you this.....I have been to some dark places in my own life that I thought I would never recover from: That dark and that painful! The events of this woman's story don't scratch the surface of mine. The kind of things that keep her up at night with tormenting night mares; that keep her in constant fear and shame. Things she can't fathom ever being free from. Now, I am not a trained counselor but I do know The Truth and that is that Jesus died to bust light into her deepest, ugliest darkness! I don't remember much of what I said to her, but I know I told her this...."Jesus has you here for a reason and He saw all that was done to you and my friend--He. Is. Not. Done! And He has not left you!!!!"
I have to be completely honest with you.....this conversation did two things. It made me realize how amazing this woman is that she still gets up each God given day and puts one foot in front of the other in search of peace and wholeness. It also made me wonder....can my God really heal wounds as deep as hers? I have said in the past that I believe He can, but then I heard her story and part of me thought, 'this is a story on T.V. not someones actual life'!!!!!
Fast forward two days later to my second conversation.....this one was with Jesus Himself. This is the second year that our church has done a week of prayer where you sign up to go to the church to a prayer room that they have set up for us to come and pray in for an hour. Last year the hour wasn't long enough. This year I had to be done a bit early. Why? Because of God's goodness, grace, and relentless mercy. There were 6 stations set up in this room. Praise, Confession, Realizing who I am to God, Praying for my community, Praying for our world, and Meditating. The first one had music playing and a chalk board set up for people to write a name of God. The lyrics to the song that was playing grabbed my attention...
Come out of sadness
From wherever you've been
Come broken hearted
Let rescue begin
Come find your mercy
Oh sinner come kneel
Earth has no sorrow
That heaven can't heal...
There's hope for the hopeless
And all those who've strayed
Come sit at the table
Come taste the grace
There's rest for the weary
Rest that endures
Earth has no sorrow
That heaven can't cure....
David Crowder "Come As You Are"
And, so the conversation began. For the next hour He began to remind me that I need to make time to come and lay my head on His lap and soak in the reality that He is still making beauty for ashes. He is big enough to bring healing to this amazing woman. He put her in my path, on an ordinary weekday, to make me question some of what I believe, so that I could see God move in a room full of little tables where He could remind me of all that He is. That small chalk board wasn't enough to hold the names of God....people filled the entire wall behind it!!!!! That wasn't the original plan, but what are we human's supposed to do when we can not contain His goodness, His grace, and His relentless mercy!!!!!
He wants to take us deeper and sometimes we have to go through some EXTREMELY dark places to begin to realize how much He truly, deeply, freely, and unconditionally He loves us.
"When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father, the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth. I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God's love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is."
Ephesians 3:14-18
There aren't many times in life that we get to have conversations with people that change something in us. It is more than changing our minds, perspectives, or views. I feel like these conversations touched a part of my soul that I had either forgotten about or just plain didn't know existed.
The first one was with a sweet woman who found it in her heart to trust me enough to share parts of her life that would have stopped the ordinary person from ever getting out of bed ever again! I don't feel like I can share the specifics of her story because I don't have her permission to do so, but I can tell you this.....I have been to some dark places in my own life that I thought I would never recover from: That dark and that painful! The events of this woman's story don't scratch the surface of mine. The kind of things that keep her up at night with tormenting night mares; that keep her in constant fear and shame. Things she can't fathom ever being free from. Now, I am not a trained counselor but I do know The Truth and that is that Jesus died to bust light into her deepest, ugliest darkness! I don't remember much of what I said to her, but I know I told her this...."Jesus has you here for a reason and He saw all that was done to you and my friend--He. Is. Not. Done! And He has not left you!!!!"
I have to be completely honest with you.....this conversation did two things. It made me realize how amazing this woman is that she still gets up each God given day and puts one foot in front of the other in search of peace and wholeness. It also made me wonder....can my God really heal wounds as deep as hers? I have said in the past that I believe He can, but then I heard her story and part of me thought, 'this is a story on T.V. not someones actual life'!!!!!
Fast forward two days later to my second conversation.....this one was with Jesus Himself. This is the second year that our church has done a week of prayer where you sign up to go to the church to a prayer room that they have set up for us to come and pray in for an hour. Last year the hour wasn't long enough. This year I had to be done a bit early. Why? Because of God's goodness, grace, and relentless mercy. There were 6 stations set up in this room. Praise, Confession, Realizing who I am to God, Praying for my community, Praying for our world, and Meditating. The first one had music playing and a chalk board set up for people to write a name of God. The lyrics to the song that was playing grabbed my attention...
Come out of sadness
From wherever you've been
Come broken hearted
Let rescue begin
Come find your mercy
Oh sinner come kneel
Earth has no sorrow
That heaven can't heal...
There's hope for the hopeless
And all those who've strayed
Come sit at the table
Come taste the grace
There's rest for the weary
Rest that endures
Earth has no sorrow
That heaven can't cure....
David Crowder "Come As You Are"
And, so the conversation began. For the next hour He began to remind me that I need to make time to come and lay my head on His lap and soak in the reality that He is still making beauty for ashes. He is big enough to bring healing to this amazing woman. He put her in my path, on an ordinary weekday, to make me question some of what I believe, so that I could see God move in a room full of little tables where He could remind me of all that He is. That small chalk board wasn't enough to hold the names of God....people filled the entire wall behind it!!!!! That wasn't the original plan, but what are we human's supposed to do when we can not contain His goodness, His grace, and His relentless mercy!!!!!
He wants to take us deeper and sometimes we have to go through some EXTREMELY dark places to begin to realize how much He truly, deeply, freely, and unconditionally He loves us.
"When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father, the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth. I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God's love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is."
Ephesians 3:14-18
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